droplets of trust

As the journey of moving to California started over a year ago now, I had a moment to make some connections tonight about events which have occurred that are NOT by coincidence. I don't believe in coincidence.

One of the primary sources of reasons that I was drawn to enter into the MFT program at Fuller was due to my mentor who is a marriage and family therapist in Seattle. My mentor had spent a good deal of my senior year of college being alongside me, listening to the tiniest details, praying for me, and encouraging a pursuit of a degree in therapy. One of the pieces of advice which she gave me before I left was recommending that I connect with a counseling center which is located in my city. I listened to her advice, but in the process of applying to many sites, and discerning which would be an option which would be the most suited, I ended up in a different clinic. Opportunity missed? Not possible in the narrative which I believe God is amongst.

I had begun at my site, working with the clients who I sit with. Often times I am in silence because I wonder and feel like I am in a phase of learning how to be a therapist who soaks in a lot of the dynamics of families of which these people are in, as well as their descriptions of pain and issues which I have never encountered, which makes me marvel at their resilence and strength.

In the midst of this, (and it has only been a couple months) I felt unsettled and anxious about the fact that I am not as passionate about working with adults as I had anticipated. Recently, the opportunity to work in Pasadena Unified SD, with teenage girls came up within a supervision session I was in. I voiced an interest, as well as the fact that I had some experience from college working with teens. Honestly, I think there is SOO much potential and opportunity for finding a sense of independence, identity and worth in the teenage years which may not be as fruitful later on within life.... and I could go on!!! So, after expressing this interest.... there were a lot of details which have been occurring backstage including the fact that this organization, who has worked with teenagers in Pasadena for over 15 years, really wanted to connect with my clinic. AND, this is the thrilling part, they wanted interns!

So, yesterday, after an interview with the executive director, including a great deal of work which they have done in order to make sure that I will be allowed to recieve my california required hours, I am honored to be placed as a therapist in the Pasadena High Schools counseling these young women who seek models of what it means to live as a woman in a society who has many conflicting messages.

The thing which I learned, and one of the awesome connections which I made was that the VERY same clinic which my mentor had told me over and over to get connected with, is the same clinic that STARTED this program over 15 years ago in the city. The founder was a fellow intern of my Mentor. insane. So.... from this, for me, this is a demonstration of how a droplet of trust, which began as I started at a clinic which I was unsure about.... led to something that I am looking forward to seeing how I will be able to serve a group of teens who will share their lives with me, who I get to live among as well. I think these droplets of trust, trust in seeking out the God who is the God of compassion and of sustenance, continue to be something that is calling me out of a place of remaining stagnant, to a place of growth and also unknown.